Top 10 Forbidden Text Zones Revealed

We all know how great texting can be most of the time, but what about the times and places texting isn't so great?

Research on this subject was a bit sketchy, but here's the top 10 forbidden text zones I was able to locate:

10.  After you've been pulled over by your neighborhood cop - because you're just going to piss him off
9.    While your pole dancing - because a cell phone just isn't very sexy
8.    During prayer - because your pastor might get jealous (It happened)
7.    At your local "Swingers" get together - well... the "because" is too disgusting to mention so RBTL
6.    While you're catching a wave in San Diego - because water and cell phones don't mix
5.    During your HR meeting while you're getting your ass chewed for cell phone abuse - because you        need the money
4.    When you're visiting the Porcelain God - because it's just too disgusting to do both at the same time
3.    While you're at the batting cages with balls flying at 90 mpg - because you can't afford more plastic surgery! 
2.    When riding a mechanical bull - because cowboys can't multi task, so neither should you
1.    While you're getting busy in the bedroom - you do the math

That's the newest unofficial lineup of forbidden text zones... but I need your input to make it official!  Please, list your personal place or space where you've banned all text messages.

Common, it's your turn to share.

Texting Tips For Tiger

As we've painfully learned from the media, in the case of Tiger Woods vs. the alleged gals that are coming out of every nook and cranny with saved voice mails, a text message might have been a safer way to go.

Here's a few texting tips for Tiger:

If you're going to contact your girlfriends, don't leave recorded messages or FB updates that can be later held against you.

And definitely don't leave panicked messages about your wife, on your girlfriends voice mail! Instead, send her a text message. This way, your voice won't be able to be compared against your actual voice by the media (and heard around the world by just about everyone) just to be sure it's really your voice.

Text your inappropriate messages appropriately so you don't get busted.

Make up your own secret text lingo that no one understands but you and your gal pals. This way, your code won't be broken by your loved ones.

Don't risk sexting with your gals - a picture says a thousand words you DON'T want to hear.

Don't use your girlfriends real names in your address book, so your loved ones can easily find them. Names like Bambi, Lola or Bubbles are dead give aways. Think about changing their names to George, Louis or Thomas. What woman would Read Between the Lines with those names?

Seriously, don't try any of this at home - it's not worth it.

Instead, love the one you're with and keep those helicopters that are circling your home 24/7 away... you're just too good to be in the middle of all the crap!